Monday, November 5, 2007

On To Oregon - The 50 States Series

The one and only time that I've been to Oregon was on a road trip that Bisque and I took back in 1996. Yes, this was the trip where we got busted at the Canadian border. That's another story for another blog. As we made our way down the coast from Vancouver, we decided to check out a few places in Oregon. We took in lots of nature, slept in a yurt, hiked Crater Lake.

One of the main reasons for us to spend time in Oregon was a man by the name of Liebler. Another ex-friend of my dad's, Liebler used to live in New Orleans. I met him around my senior year of high school when he and my dad were practically inseparable. He had moved to New Orleans in the late 1980s to work for an AM radio station called WSMB. Liebler was an older beatnik, I guess you'd say. I guess you're old, by virtue of being a beatnik, right? Long white hair, a New Yorker from way back, a pothead...but now, a pothead with a raging hiatal hernia.
Sometime around the mid '90s, Liebler had high-tailed it to a tiny town near Ashland, Oregon, when he found out that he had a son there. Okay, let me clarify: apparently, Liebler had been sleeping with a woman who turned out to be a born-again Christian, who later shunned him and denounced him as a heathen. BUT - she had a baby in Oregon whom she claimed that Liebler had sired. However, she refused to let him do the blood tests. Liebler took her word for it, and moved to Oregon to provide this 5 year old boy named Leon with a Dad - a Dad who was not full of fire and brimstone. One who liked to hang out by the creek, carving wooden statues of a vaginal nature. Liebler wanted this kid to have a fighting chance.
When we showed up to stay at Liebler's place , we immediately noticed his issue with the hiatal hernia. He couldn't get too many words out without burping. Funny at first, but really like a speech impediment. The marijuana he smoked continuously throughout the day was medicinal and served to relax his esophageal sphincter. The other thing that made a big difference in his condition was the Lithium spring-fed water fountain in the town of Ashland, just 20 miles away. Shortly after arriving, we had to cruise out there in his white Chrysler LeBaron convertible. People swear by the healing powers of the Lithium springs...it made a huge difference for him. The results lasted about an hour or two, and then he'd have to smoke, since it was a bit of a trek. Unfortunately, the Lithium water, once bottled, lost its powers.

I can't remember how we spent our first night there, but we spent the next day with his 5 year- old son, Leon, on the property/farm adjacent to a creek. Liebler, as I mentioned, busied himself with whittling & sculpting. His son was great with numbers and negotiating, so Monopoly was the natural choice for the day's events. It didn't seem impossible that Leon was Liebler's son, but it wasn't perfectly obvious either. A request was made for me to return to the house to get the game board as well as some other supplies. When I came back to join the others by the creek, I innocently put my hand on a gate that had previously been propped open.
Doesn't everyone need to be shocked by an electric fence just once in their lives?? Apparently, I let out a shrill scream and wound up on my back - Monopoly pieces, get out of jail free cards, Marvin Gardens - all of it whirled around. I recovered quickly and played badminton afterwards.

We traveled to Ashland each day we were there for Lithium water as well as entertainment. On that trip, we saw 2 horrible movies: Striptease with Demi Moore and Independence Day (which we actually watched on Independence Day). On the way home, our host mentioned that his botanist son had left him with some opium poppies which he had stashed in the trunk of his LeBaron the entire time! It was a miracle we were never pulled over, since Liebler drives
like a maniac...a burping maniac, at that. We requested that he remove the contraband from the vehicle, since we were trying not to get arrested that week. The three of us contemplated trying the opium, but somehow never got around to it.

The kicker is that Leon is not Liebler's son. A DNA test proved that there was not a drop of Jewish hippie blood in that cute little blond boy. It was just a coincidence that he was great at Monopoly. I would imagine that he and Liebler grew very close during the years that he spent in that remote area of eastern Oregon. I have no idea if they're still in touch.

I just spoke with Liebler back in September. He's living on the Oregon coast, in some tiny town up north. He was still burping throughout the entire conversation, but it seemed better. He is still sculpting spread-eagle women and had a mixed media installation at a gallery in his town. The state is paying him to live in the house he bought, since it's an historical marker. He's in the process of restoring it and living off of the mammoth vegetables he grows, since he says he has practically no money.
He told me that he is still searching for the potion to cure him of his hiatal hernia.
In the meantime, he is sticking to his vigorous daily regimen of lunges, squats and chin-ups that he does to a Fleetwood Mac mix-tape that I gifted to him after our visit.
I hope that little Leon, who would now be 17, remembers his few years with the dad who really wasn't his dad. I've managed to stay away from electric fences since that time in Oregon, but I'd like to go back and check out Liebler's new digs and meet any new possible offspring of his.

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Florida - The 50 State Series

Serious case of writer's block, folks. Maybe you've enjoyed the 2 months or so without having to endure these weekly rants. Well, I'm back on purpose. I'm going to take a stab at patriotism by kicking off the 50 States Series. I will attempt to write about some of the states I've been to or about people from particular states. I may not cover all of them...in fact, I know that I will not. But, it is a topic to help grease the wheels, so to speak. Here goes Florida.

I wish I knew exactly how many times I've been to Florida over the course of my 34 years. I've covered the Gulf side, Atlantic side, inland (though not too much)...
never been to Tallahassee or as far north as Jacksonville, though.

The trips to the land of Ponce de Leon started pretty early on. My paternal grandparents, Izzy and Chickee, moved to a retirement community in Margate (near Fort Lauderdale) in the late 1970s. We went there very few times back when we were a family unit. My dad wasn't a big fan of visiting his own parents. Out of guilt, I still head to Margate every few years to put in a lunch visit with my grandfather, Izzy, who is 93.

I think of my last trip to see Izzy back on my 32nd
birthday. Bisq and I were staying with Uncle Beast at his condo in DelRay Beach, about an hour away from Margate. Over that weekend, we had many unexpected encounters with parrots, which we take as a great omen. Even cruising on the interstate, Bisq spotted a blue and gold macaw in the passenger seat of a passing car. Come to think of it, my bird, Raj, comes from a breeder near Jacksonville. It's no stretch to say that parrot owners, much like old people, flock to Florida.

A dear friend of ours, Don B., lives in West Palm Beach. He is a yacht broker who used to own dry cleaners in his former life before Florida [BF]. He still loves his ciggies, his rum and coke for breakfast, and blow-dries what's left of his hair, making sure that the area that grazes his collar is curled under and not too frizzy looking - a fairly tall order when you live in Florida. Like us, Don hails from Metairie, LA. Don used to sail with my dad (see The Family Gun, for more details) before they had a huge falling-out in the late 1980s. I couldn't bear to give up my relationship with Don, so I secretly visit him when I'm on the Atlantic Florida coast.

I've definitely spent some time on the Florida Panhandle. People in the know call that region the Redneck Riviera. I feel like I know every inch of th
e Gulf Coast, and I can easily say that I don't miss it very much. I am sad to see that the changing weather patterns are doing away with this region a little faster than the rest of the country. I have some almost trashy, almost sweet memories of the Panhandle.
For some reason I am remembering a trip to Gulf Shores, Alabama (which is spitting distance from Pensacola, FL) that I took as a teenage babysitter along with another family who had two very young kids. The main attraction, besides the beach, is the mammoth wave pool where the undertow is so deadly that girls' ponytails are tragically snapped off each day. I've had some unpleasant encounters with the treacherous metal grating on the side of the pool that sucks everything from hair to jelly-shoes off of the typical buck-toothed southerner on vacation in Gulf Shores. While on that trip, I pilfered a joint off of the cool mom, Elaine, who made the mistake of carelessly leaving it on the counter in the bathroom. What a score. I carefully guarded that joint in the pocket of my white perma-press tennis shorts for the entire week, just waiting for the perfect Florida moment. I walked along the beach with it to a bar that straddled the Alabama/Florida border: the Florabama Bar. I thought for sure that I would meet the right people with whom I could whip out this bit of contraband and have a legendary time. At 14, looking more like 12, standing at about 4'8"- it's a good thing I was widely ignored at the Florabama Bar. That very
joint of Elaine's came home with me to New Orleans and stayed in my jewelery box for years un-smoked, but quite kinked from the journey it had made in my shorts all the way from Florida.

I journeyed back to the Panhandle around Easter 2002. We traveled there with some of our Atlanta friends and stayed with Jeanne (whom we lovingly refer to as "the Coach") at her beach house which they called Puckered Out. A team of heavily drunk and twasted lesbians and gay dudes were also guests at Puckered Out that weekend. A key player during this Easter beach trip was the frozen toddy machine set up to make super-sweet margaritas and rum-runners round the clock. As you can imagine, the scene got ugly fast. It all culminated around midnight when Coach's ex, the Roach, was wasted in the kitchen making pancakes with a six year old girl (the unfortunate daughter of a visiting neighbor in this beach community).
One of Roach's eyes was crossed and the other closed. With spatula in hand, she was cursing under her breath, "alright, you little shit - one more pancake." Roach was particularly ornery because it was obvious that the Coach was hooking back up with her Florida girlfriend, right there in front of Roach's drunken eyes. That poor little six year old would have to experience the wrath.
On that same expedition, Brian, a.k.a., "the Brain," broke his toe while we walking to the beach to watch fireworks. We heard it break, and I think someone in the group re-set it for him back in the living room at Puckered Out. While inebriated, he proceeded to give us a lecture where he emphatically repeated the phrase, "I LOVE MY SIBLINGS!" Bisk and I did our best to escape all of the wasted guests who were up to no good and trapping us in their drunken tirades. On that particular weekend, it was unsafe to swim in the Gulf due to an algae that was spotted via satellite. As Brain put it (way too many times): "Thi-entists (scientists with a lisp, in case you couldn't catch it) are baffled!!" After spending 2 frightening nights with the tireless toddy machine, Bisq and I decided to head back up the I-85 to our apartment in Atlanta.

Leaving the pan-handle and heading southeast, you get to the Tampa/St.Pete region.
I attended practice management seminars which were based out of Clearwater, FL. The last one I went to was in early September 2005. My friend, Leena, and I stayed with a pretty offbeat (to put it kindly) married couple, Bob and
Marion, who I'd met several times through these seminars targeted toward Acupuncturists and Chiropractors. We stayed with them at their house for one night in Dade City, so that we could avoid paying for a hotel room in Clearwater. I probably need an entire blog to describe these people, but here are some keywords: rat-tail, ex-Parrot owners, 50-ish, ex-coke-heads, swingers, overweight, acupuncturists, vocal sex enthusiasts. They took us by their impressive acupuncture clinic in Dade City where Bob (husband with rat-tail) prescribed me some kind of female topical sex enhancement cream (unsolicited, by the way). He and Marion spent the better part of the night begging us to smoke a joint with them and trying to coax us into their indoor swimming pool for a nighttime dip. They couldn't have barked up a wronger tree. Gotta love Floridians...

You really want to love Key West, especially after reading Hemingway's Islands in the Stream and
short stories by Bob Shacochis (a literary find by Bisq). It's pretty laughable that I wanted to move there, sight-unseen back when I was 22. The shame about Key West is that it pretty much sucks. It's way more Florida than it is Cuba, to say the least. Hemingway knew a much different place than the one that's there now. Bisq, Zulie and I visited back in 1997 and stayed pretty wasted drinking at a variety of shitty tourist bars that have you seated on white plastic lawn furniture. At least in New Orleans, they try to give you some sort of unique experience. Over there it's all go-cups and mid-westerners with fat pink legs. We actually managed to have a great trip - the alcohol helped tremendously. We kept ourselves entertained by falling into the hot tub fully clothed and getting into fights with people at the B&B where we stayed.

Like I said before, I can't even remember all of the times I've been to "Flower-da," as my great-grandmother called it. These are just some vague memories of a state where I've worn a lot of bad French-cut bathing suits, drunk a lot of red, blue and green beverages, been scared as hell of its inhabitants and witnessed some twasted behavior.

Stay tuned for Oregon.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Goodbye Amma


I returned today from Amma's funeral. Amma was my 87 year old grandmother. I wrote a eulogy replete with jokes and sweet memories of all of our years with her. I salted a few members of the audience so that my jokes wouldn't fall flat. This was the first time I had ever delivered a eulogy. I was sort of nervous and worried that my voice would quiver and that I'd be a puddle by the end of the first page. Things went surprisingly well. I have a Southwest Airlines flight attendant to thank for some coaching. I met this particular flight attendant on the flight from Phoenix to New Orleans. He appeared too old and well-spoken for the job. Turns out he was a rabbi in a Reformed congregation in Phoenix for 30 years before he fulfilled his lifelong dream of becoming a flight attendant. He informed me that his salary is the same (low triple-digits, in case you're curious). It's just that now he doesn't have to deal with Jews complaining about his sermons for a living. He cracks dumb jokes in front of the cockpit and pours diet cokes. Look for a balding man with the last name Pinkwasser the next time you're on Southwest.

I'm feeling good about the send-off we gave Amma. It was a simple grave-side funeral. The young rabbi, Uri, who presided had all of us shoveling dirt over her grave. I've never seen Augie (my brother)do that much physical labor. My uncle, Norman, was clutching his chest after 4 feet of earth covered her pine coffin. Amma would've said, "Isn't this what we paid the funeral home for? "The rabbi did the symbolic tearing of our clothing; for the ladies, it was a ribbon pinned to our lapels. We cried when my mom yelled "Goodbye Mom," down into the grave. All of our speeches included imitations of Amma's high-pitched thick southern accent.
Augie's speech involved a prop: an oatmeal cookie. Light rain fell as we walked away from the grave. God's tears, according to Uri.
I've said goodbye to a lot of loved ones over the past few years. This whole cycle of life thing is proving to be true. I guess I'm not getting out of here alive either. But in the meantime -
happy Halloween, keep in touch, and make your friendship with me a huge priority.

Sunday, August 19, 2007

The Harvest On Its Way: A Birthday Dedication

It's with a heavy heart that I am in L.A. right now and NOT attending Blake's 35th birthday
in his backyard in San Francisco. I've got a valid excuse and it weighs about 21 lbs and crawls real fast.
I was along, via cell phone, for all of the decisions and hardships that came before this blessed event, so it's just not right that I'm AWOL. It sucks, and I spent all of today in a cranky mood.
For his birthday, Blake orchestrated a way for all of his friends who aren't afraid to get dirty and can handle a shovel to plant him a garden of his own replete with fruits, veggies and herbs. A chef should have his own artichokes, tomatoes and squash, right? Having friends with "agricultural"operations up in Mendocino County and lots of friends who know lots about landscaping, he should have it made. That, and a spit-roasted lamb - what more can someone with a belly want for?
Tonight's waxing crescent moon will glow over his new garden in his backyard. I look forward to the meals we will share over the next 35 years. Happy Birthday, saster.

Friday, August 10, 2007

Playing Swanee

You'd never know it now, but I spent ten years of my life taking weekly piano lessons. That's roughly 520 lessons! Put me in front of a piano now and I might play the same dirge that I was working on back when I stopped taking lessons at age 15. Or, I might piddle around and play a little part of Swanee by George Gershwin - lately, I find myself tapping it out on my son's Fisher-Price alligator xylophone. It needs some work...to say the least.

Over the years, I had four different piano teachers. The first was an older, bearded gentleman (at that time late 30's seemed "older") named Greg. He came to the house to teach me. We played a few songs that involved middle C. One song was called Halloween:
C-D-E, C-D-E, E-D-C, E-D-C: Halloween, Halloween, let's have fun, let's have fun
Bust that out at a holiday party. I accused Greg of stinking once. He never came back to the house after that. I was 5 years old. Years later, I realized that it wasn't him, but rather broccoli steaming. My mom was a vegetarian at the time.
Ava Rosenberg was next. She taught lessons to me and my brother out of a small studio at my school. She was sweet and had a dyed blond fuzzy mustache. I'll bet by now she's discovered wax is better than bleach for that kind of thing. She taught my brother how to play
Saucer Man.

Then came Mrs. Phillips, who I studied under for the longest stretch of my career as a piano student. She worked at our synagogue and had actually given my parents lessons when they were newlyweds. She was a classic mean old lady who wore too much rose-scented perfume (luckily, she was never in the same room with Greg! Broccoli + Rose= ?). For years, she scolded me while I played, struck my hand with a pencil when it stumbled over the wrong notes and screamed, "that's an
E, honey!" She entered me into recitals and forced me to play a duet with her on stage. These were my first episodes of anxiety that I can remember. I would get up on the stage, forget to say my name and what I would be performing, and do something really awkward like lick my lips in a circular motion. I must have looked quite psychotic. While on stage I would often blank-out on what piece I was playing - it was as if I had left my body there on the stage to fend for itself. I wonder if Mrs.Phillips is still kicking?

The last teacher I had, Tim Davis, is someone who keeps coming back to my thoughts. He died shortly after I quit taking lessons from him. Tim really wasn't a piano teacher by trade. He was, however, an excellent self-taught pianist and entertainer. My parents discovered and befriended him at a fancy party where he was performing. He was pretty stunning to behold: skin the color of caramel, a well-designed handlebar mustache and a body rippled with muscles that he didn't have to work for. He was a complete clown and really wasn't effective at teaching me piano. It probably had more to do with me and my programming. After years of traditional and classical instruction, I couldn't learn piano the groovy way. Playing by ear was out of the question. I needed to slave over sheet music, and I had no jazzy inclinations. Mrs. Phillips had ruined me.

Still, my parents payed Tim to come over every week. That's when I began working on
Swanee by George Gershwin. Tim took away the sheet music and tried to teach me to feel the music. It's a project that was never completed. Perhaps my cousin, Jason, can sit me down and show me how it's done. We spent most of the lessons goofing off. Tim liked to imitate me, and I couldn't get enough of him. He made me laugh at myself and my mechanical approach to the keys. Sometimes we'd shout to each other during the entire lesson, as a means for more effective communication. He had nicknames for my different wardrobe ensembles. At that time, I was in a preppy, girly phase involving sweaters with hearts and tightly closed collars. He called my look "very puppy."
Tim and his wife, JoAnn, partied with my parents. Often, they would join us on our boat during the weekends. Tim was a one-man-party. They were guests at one of the rowdiest Thanksgivings that my house ever witnessed. Tim showed up at this jeans and tee-shirt event wearing a white tuxedo.
According to Tim, his mother was one of the vocalists from the original
The Lion Sleeps Tonight - you know that backup melody? It was probably a lie, but I still think of Tim whenever I hear that ubiquitous tune.

Well, here's the heartbreaking part of this whole story. Apparently, Tim had a drug problem: crack, to be more specific. I never witnessed it, but JoAnn confessed the problem to my dad, who mentioned it blithely to me, as if a 15 year-old could handle that news. I became hysterical when I found out. I had only heard about people doing crack, and I never imagined that I actually knew one of these people. And, of all people, Tim! Things kind of fell apart for Tim; Jo Ann and her daughter kicked him out, and he stopped coming over to give me the lessons. My parents gave me the green light to abandon the piano, though I would, on very rare occasion, sit down and try to figure out the rest of
Swanee. My dad still communicated with Tim, who was living in a rough part of town. He had become skinny and hollowed-out, but still maintained his handlebar mustache. I can't remember the last time that I saw Tim, but he didn't seem to have any special affection toward me at that point. Maybe he had left his body behind to fend for itself, like I did during those recitals. When you're a starry-eyed 15 year old, it's hard not to take things personally.

It's fun to think back and remember Tim and how he would croon along with my mechanical piano playing. I'm looking to get back into playing a musical instrument. Something where I can let go of my inner robot. It might not be the piano though. My dad, at 67, still takes piano lessons sporadically. He, too, plays like a robot, but one who's low on batteries. Next to him, I'm Ray Charles. My step-mother winces when he sits down to tickle the ivories. If Tim were around, he'd be marching alongside Dad at the piano like a member of the Korean People's Army with crossed eyes and his tongue wagging. Where did
that Tim go?


Tuesday, July 31, 2007

To Share Or Not To Share

W.W.J.D? Is there anything written about this in the 10 Commandments? How about the Qu'aran?
TO SHARE OR NOT TO SHARE?
That is the question.

This morning at 7:58 AM, my landlord and his hound appeared at my locked gate. He rang the doorbell because he was desperate, I suppose. For the second time in less than a year, he had stopped up his toilet and came up to our house to borrow our plunger. Wire hangers weren't cutting it this morning, I'm assuming. Let's define the work of a toilet plunger, shall we? What is does is make mince-meat out of poo. Right? It's a job that needs to be done, and some years it has to be done more than others. Eat your fiber and you will be blessed - God willing, Baruch HaShem, Insha'Allah. And, it's worth taking the plunge (pardon the pun) to buy one of these things because you will inevitably need to do some mincing during your many decades on this planet (again, God willing, Baruch HaShem, Insha'Allah). Plus they're still pretty affordable.
Come upstairs once, fine. But, then go and buy one! And while you're at it, get some other personal items that you might not like to borrow from others: Prep H with the long applicator, Tucks pads, lube...what have you. Lending out my plunger to another person and then storing it, knowing it was mincing elsewhere - I have a beef with this. As my grandfather wrote in a letter he sent to me over 20 years ago: "neither a borrower nor a lender be."
I know it sounds crazy. I don't mind having one plunger per household for all who dwell under one roof to share. Guests are included. I just don't like the idea of mixing family matters. I like to think that there is some kind of biblical taboo.

Later on, when my awkward lonely landlord tries to return it, I'm not sure if I should allow it back in. It's been tainted too many times. It will be one of those conversations with a lot of fake politeness:
"No, really, you can keep it."
"You sure? I can buy you a new one?"
No, really, I insist.

Monday, July 30, 2007

What The World Needs Now Is Michael Franks

For many of you who admit to reading this blog, perhaps you'd also admit to owning a few Michael Franks albums. Maybe it's thanks to me. Or, maybe you happen to have impeccable taste. Since I've completely run out of blog-topics for the last two weeks, I thought I could turn some of you on to this exemplary adult contemporary music. Some friends have caught on and can see the genius, others think he's a cheeseball. My pal, Bruce, called it "Tootsie music" years back when I professed my love for Michael Franks. I happen to think Tootsie was a fine movie, and would have been even better, had they chosen a musical score by Michael Franks.
I got my first taste of his brand of music in the early 80's. My parents were fans and often played The Art of Tea, released in 1976. Back then my 2 favorites tracks were "Eggplant" and "Popsicle Toes." I used to run around the house reciting the lyrics: "You got the nicest North America this sailor ever saw - I like to feel your warm Brazil and touch your Panama."Of course, the interpretive dance that went with it was really special. If I'm not mistaken, I think it involved tennis balls and a pair of high-heels.

Undoubtedly, his finest album is Sleeping Gypsy. Every song is a work of art. Listening to this album makes you feel like you've lived on a yacht your whole life...and I'm not talking about the yacht that I lived on with my Dad yelling at me. This is the yacht where you eat tropical fruits and play the steel drum with your pet monkey on one shoulder and your Amazon parrot on the other. Oh, and in this world, you don't look like a ridiculous white person when you dance, either. Check it out if you don't already have it. A lot of peeps like to do the nasty to this album.

I like how ubiquitous Franks' music is, and it always appears when you need it most. I just received an e-mail from Sklave while on his honeymoon. He let me know that while dining in a kosher restaurant in Rome, "The Lady Wants to Know" (from Sleeping Gypsy) was cued up just as they finished ordering. Italians know what's up...
The television show Northern Exposure was smart enough to use the song "Monkey See - Monkey Do" on one of their episodes. I always wondered who were the Michael Franks fans out there? Are they fat and white? Lesbians? Are they always eating coconuts?

Fast forward to 2001. We find out that Michael Franks is coming to Atlanta, so we buy tickets to finally check out his crowd and get to see him live. [My mom had seen him in concert in the late 80's and was disappointed that he no longer looked like he did on his albums. Basically, he had gotten fat and looked old. It's kind of like the Christopher Cross thing. He was smart to put a flamingo on the cover of his hit album. Once you see him, "Ride Like the Wind" doesn't make you feel so foxy. Anyway, Franks hasn't had a decent album since Passion Fruit in 1983.] The crowd, much to my excitement, was mostly upscale African-American. Lots of the same people you'd expect to see at an Al Jarreau concert. But, the concert sucked. Franks looked haggard and didn't have a saxophone accompanying him. The band was dominated by an annoying pianist who thought he was playing free-jazz and some bad back-up singers. One thing Michael Franks' music is not and should not be is challenging. If it doesn't groove you into melancholy bliss like some kind of musical rum drink, then it ain't happening. We left early. It's not that we'd given up on him, it's just that we wanted to hold on to our image of Franks with long wavy hair, a mustache, tight jeans and a halfway unzipped Members Only jacket.


This photo of Biscuit in Peru was inspired by Michael Franks and our quest to capture his essence: There are 5 albums of his that should be in everyone's collection: The Art Of Tea, Sleeping Gypsy, Tiger In The Rain, Objects Of Desire and Passion Fruit. You can skip almost everything that came out between 1983 and 2006. I almost like his latest release, Rendezvous in Rio, as it feels like a throw-back to his old style. When morale is low in your house or you'd like to feel a little more like you just got back from Tahiti instead of Costco, pop in some Franks.
These days, Michael Franks has been splitting his time between Woodstock, NY, and Sanibel Island, FL, where he runs a shelter for errant Dachshunds. Is there anything jazzier than a wiener dog?